


TO: My lost "Home".

by ZXA



Category: Future Card Buddyfight
Genre: M/M, Multi, No parents, also theyre Soft, im gonna be reusing the disappearance plotline in the future since its only a motivation here, noboru gets angsty tm, noboru kiri rouga is god tier ship and nobody can tell me otherwise, sometimes you nearly die, this is just so.valid
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-30
Updated: 2018-05-30
Packaged: 2019-05-16 04:21:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,819
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14804270
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZXA/pseuds/ZXA
Summary: Adults have been disappearing, and children cannot stay in their homes.But sometimes, your home can be a bunch of warm friends.





	TO: My lost "Home".

_ The things that used to be — envisioning it in my head, the days that were no longer here were stronger than the sense of nostalgia of merely being in the same house from before. _

_ I knew it wasn’t real, that something was wrong— that I was alone and too small for this world. _

_ “Isn’t your mother supposed to be home?” An honest question, from an honest buddy. _

_ I couldn’t think of an answer. _

 

_ “She probably got held up.” _

_ “She’ll be here eventually.” _

_ “She’s just not home yet.” _

 

_ I hadn’t accepted the truth until it became a problem. _

_ My parents had ‘disappeared’ and weren’t going to come home. _

 

_ I was alone. I was alone and it was cold and I was weak. There was no home to go back to anymore. _

_ … Accepting this, I had no idea what to do, so I began to wander. _

 

The pitter-pattering and crushing of snow beneath my feet had become a noticeable part of the last few hours.

I could no longer feel my fingertips, even as I rubbed my hands together for warmth.

But honestly that wasn’t even the worst part about any of this— the numbness, the noises, even missing my  _ family  _ had nothing on the fact that I could not contact the friends I had.

Ones that I’d come to rely on in a sense.

In particular, remembering how he’d responded to my not-telling-him-about-something-important  _ before,  _ what I felt was the worst part about this was being incapable of contacting my friend and rival,  _ Gao Mikado _ .

 

Pathetic of me, hm?

That said, the fueling of hatred towards myself was exactly what kept me moving.

Still, how had it gotten to this point? I knew that mom and dad would be away for a bit, but they never did come back.

 

Hadn’t there been something about this? I searched my brain for the answer and recalled a television broadcast.

“— Authorities have yet to discover the source of these disappearances. The affected have all been over the age of  _ 30 _ . Be sure to stay safe out there.”

 

_ Right,  _ a number of adults had gone missing.  _ My  _ parents were only one of the more recent cases. The buddy police had lost some members of the force, and Commander Ai had gone missing (honestly good  _ riddance,  _ but that was aside from the point). I’d heard a couple of kids talking about it prior to break, too.

 

Gao’s father was gone as well, I remembered that much.

They couldn’t find a common link between the victims.

 

Anyway, it was really bitter cold outside. Almost as bitter as me. Though I couldn’t feel much right then, there was a thick layer of white that surrounded me— with only bursts of color every so often. It was like being surrounded by  _ milk _ . Except the milk is inedible and more slush like, and there are plants in your milk—

Actually that sounds really disgusting, I digress.

 

It felt like my face was chipping off with every breeze, and I stepped forth while hugging my arms to my body. There’s only so much to do about cold.

Maybe my thoughts were so raced and aggressive because it was keeping me awake, but I had lost my place a long time ago. Finding myself stuck made me stop in place— and doing  _ that  _ made my exhaustion peak.

I felt the world spin, darken, and in an instant I was on the ground incapable of movement.

And I passed out.

 

—

I awoke covered in a ridiculous amount of blankets, in a room that I had never been in.

 

The surroundings gave a nonetheless  _ homey  _ vibe, and I intended to sit up but instead pressed a hand against my head.

 

_ Ow, ringing pain. _

 

I laid back down against the plush pillows, trying to take in what I could.

It definitely wasn’t a house. Or, maybe just not a normal one— It  _ definitely  _ wasn’t an apartment.

 

It was at that moment I noticed that the appearance mirrored that of a  _ log cabin _ .

 

A figure entered the room, and I closed my eyes, wincing and trying to relax again.

 

Did existing always feel this physically exhausting?

 

“Are you awake? I’m sorry — did I wake you, Noboru?” Oh… Soothing voice that whispered into my ears… Who could you possibly be? ( _ It was already obvious to me, that Kiri Hyoryu had saved my life _ .)

 

“You didn’t, its fine.” I said, “I’m fine.”

( _ Obviously not, but that much didn’t really matter to me. _ )

 

“You  _ aren’t fine _ !” He responded with almost a  _ sharpness _ , “When I found you— Noboru,  _ you almost died!  _ How could you say you’re fine?”

 

“I mean, I’m lying to myself as well, but go off.” I looked anywhere but at him.

 

He reached a hand out to offer me a medicine of some sort, and I sat up to take it. Thank hell he put up with my shit. I wouldn’t, if it were  _ me _ .

 

“Thanks.” I said bluntly, sliding back down. “Sorry I can’t help myself right now. You shouldn’t have to put up with me.”

 

“Just… Rest, okay?” he pulled the blankets back over me.

 

Since when was  _ Kiri  _ the mom friend?

I guess I’d never noticed.

 

I closed my eyes for a bit more rest.

 

_ The next time I opened them back up _ , it had gotten  _ most certainly  _ lighter outside. A knocking noise echoed from the door, and I groaned.

 

“ _ Hey,  _ you know what I’m here for,  _ open up _ !”

 

Kiri bolted to the door and I laid there in a daze.

 

“Sorry, sorry, Aragami-senpai — I’ve been taking care of— You know.”

 

“Yes,  _ I’m aware.  _ In any case—“

 

“Come on in, I’ll only be a moment.”

 

The sound of a door shutting, I finally found myself sitting upright.

 

_ I was being a bother just by being here, huh? _

 

I grasped at the blankets over me with balled fists. It wasn’t that I felt bad for myself, but something about being a  _ burden  _ like this made my stomach churn. I didn’t like that — I mean, to be honest, though I used to be  _ jealous  _ of Kiri, I found myself really  _ really  _ liking him. Thinking that he didn’t like me — or that I was hurting him or being a burden he carried —  _ physically, I couldn’t take that. _

 

This wasn’t my home, and the fact that I relied on him right now was…  _ awfully  _ weak of me.

 

“Ugh…” I looked to the pair ( _ though I was certain I grimaced, and felt the pit in my stomach only grow _ ).

 

“Oh, are you awake?” Kiri gasped, “I’m so sorry if I woke you.”

 

“Ah, no, really— it’s fine.”  _ Don’t apologize to me, you don’t have to be sorry. I’m sorry. I should take my sorry presence and leave. _

 

The self consciousness that had left me before returned to me, I guess.

 

They didn’t have to do this for me. They  _ shouldn’t do this for me _ , please don’t—

 

“If it’s alright with  _ you _ , we have some things to take care of.” Rouga looked at me.

 

_ I wanted to bail so fast, so far— could I even move? _

 

I tried to stand, realizing that I was more capable right now than I thought, I gave a nod.

 

“Thanks for your help, I’ll be going.” I said to Kiri with a gesture of thanks before stepping out.

 

I  _ took off _ , running again. It was fine if I went numb,  _ I didn’t want to be found _ .

Far,  _ away from everyone, everything _ . Somewhere where I could be alone.

So I couldn’t get upset at the people who were trying to help me.

 

_ So I couldn’t hurt the same people by existing. _

That was the only way now, since ‘home’ didn’t exist anymore.

 

It was when I stopped running a moment to catch my breath I noticed that even my  _ deck  _ was gone.

Completely,  _ completely alone. _

 

(That was what I wanted, right?)

I balled my fists, and ran some more.

 

I finally decided to rest when I reached a cave outside the forest. Isolated enough, maybe. Something about it made me a little sad.

 

The feeling of melancholy ran its cold hands on me, and perhaps that was why I found myself curled up. Why I let myself cry.

 

As if letting go of a flood of water that needed to rush free at some moment, bubbling with agony all this time.

 

Thinking about it, letting myself feel, until the flow finally stopped as I’d cried myself dry. It was  _ really lonely _ .

 

I sat there in silence. I didn’t really feel sorry for myself, not anymore.

 

I realized something I didn’t want to.

Mm, something I’d lied to myself about again and again and again.

 

Those  _ tragedies of love  _ I’d heard about— I already  _ was experiencing them, all this time. _

 

And I hadn’t wanted to accept them.

Maybe I really  _ had  _ needed to step back, take some time to myself and reevaluate my life choices. Not  _ just  _ wanted.

 

I thought for a while about all of it. I wasn’t sure if I should  _ return _ , with the way I left, but I definitely  _ felt  _ better.

Okay well physically I was a mess but like my emotions were  _ slightly better. _ Shut up.

 

I laid down, deciding a cave was shelter at least, folding my vest to place under my head like a pillow.

Closed my eyes, and decided to rest some more.

By the time I next awoke, it was the dawn of a new day.

“Ah— Noboru! This is where you went.” A teary eyed Kiri gazed at me with what looked like a mix of relief and exhaustion. (Wait, why was he so tired?)

 

His arms wrapped around me, holding me with a slight tremble.

He was so comfortable, I leaned against him casually— and said nothing.

 

“I’ve been looking for you all night. I’m really glad you’re okay.”

I felt something drip on me and wondered if the cave was leaking now, before I looked up at the crying Kiri.

 

“Ah— Wait.” I was going to cry if he kept being so — and — if he kept crying I’d— I gripped a little. “I’m sorry for worrying you so much. I know you were just trying to help me, but I thought I was being a burden and—… You know?”

“ _ Idiot _ .” He said, hugging me closer.

 

“You’re  _ both  _ idiots.” Said a white haired furry — oh,  _ Rouga. _

“Yeah. Sorry for keeping you up, too.” Kiri laughed nervously. I gestured for Rouga to join the hug.

 

“It’s what makes us so charming.” I grinned, not expecting him to, but he sighed and lightly wrapped a single arm around us.

 

_ To my old home: _

 

_ It seems, that now, despite everything, I have a new home. I love it here. _

_ Kiri is a wonderful person. Rouga is amazing. El Quixote is like a grandpa, and Joker is fun to be around. We even have our own sassy dog, Cerberus. _

_ I am happy. _

_ And I love everything about my new home. _

**Author's Note:**

> god this took way longer to finish than i thought it would but wow are they soft!!!


End file.
